Arden Recommends: Valentine’s Day

I had this thought for a Valentine’s Day book… I’d read a book from a top dating coach and give you all the thumbs up or thumbs down on it. I chose You Lost Him at Hello: From Dating to “I Do” by Jess McCann. Many years ago I read so many dating books. a) I’m a ferocious reader and b) I believe in getting all the help I can get to make myself a better.

However, it’s been a looooooooong time since I’ve read any kind of self-help in the dating world book. Not because I’ve found myself hitched up. But, simply because I gave up. I figured whatever was meant to be would be.

But, like the good blogger I am, I love to play up certain holidays to make my audience happy. I am, after all, a giver. So, I read You Lost Him at Hello and here’s what I got out of it: Incredible sales tips for my Rodan + Fields business.

Jess McMann is an expert salesperson turned dating coach. She offers amazing tips to get a man, keep a man, and get your ring. I learned how to prospect and fill my pipeline with men to date until one stuck.

I learned how to not respond to text messages or calls and that dude would eventually give me a buzz because I left him wanting more.

I learned that the fear of losing me would make a man propose.

What I didn’t learn was how I’m to actually love a man. And for me, I wonder if that’s not a greater purpose than simply hooking a man.

So, this Valentine’s Day, I’m stepping away from the mainstream and challenging you, single or hitched, to do the same. Look at love as something bigger than “catching him” and think about it as Christ does… how can you love the people in your life better and be  more apt to bringing them closer to Christ?

I have 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 framed in the entry way of my house. I want anyone who crosses my doorstep to know what love looks like. So, for me, I’ll never lose him at hello because my love was never about me in the first place.